What do Jehovah’s Witnesses believe? In fact, what do a lot of other religions believe in? Hocus pocus if you ask me. Either way, our ‘Beliefs’ category takes a look at various religious belief systems.
Many say that the Jehovah’s Witness religion is a cult. Do you think it’s a cult? In this section, we’ve housed all the blog posts that show you if it is a cult or not. You might be shocked at what you find.
The Watchtower Organisation looks after all the Jehovah’s Witnesses worldwide. The good news about the ‘Organisation’ is that it keeps having magic moments, allowing us to poke fun at it.
Real Life Experiences
This section is filled with the real life experiences of former and current Jehovah’s Witnesses. It’s a real eye opener that shows you what various trials and tribulations Jehovah’s Witness go through.
Check out the latest funny posts. If you’re single, the chat up / pick up lines article will have you rolling around on the Kingdom Hall floor. That’ll make you wish you stayed behind for ‘Hall Cleaning’.
Increase in Emblem Partakers at the Jehovah’s Witnesses MemorialSubmitted by Teeny on April 5, 2012 - 1:10 pm 26 Comments
When I was a child, my parents always made a big deal of the Jehovah’s Witnesses Memorial of Christs Death. As we drove to the Kingdom Hall, my father would say, every year without fail, “You know what? This could be the very last memorial we ever go to. The new system is so close!”
How were we supposed to know that the end was nigh? Because the Watchtower Bible and Tract Society taught that when Armageddon arrived, there would still be some of the 144,000 anointed people left on Earth. “The Generation that will by no means pass away,” they said.
As most of the anointed were very old and dying, the number of anointed left on earth was dwindling. At the memorial, only the anointed are to partake of the bread and wine, thus giving everybody an update on how many of them had floated up to heaven over the past year and left us one death closer to the great day of Armageddon.
But if Jehovah’s Witness doctrine is to be believed, each year that passes means that the end is getting even further away. How? Because each year, the number of people partaking of the emblems is increasing:
Of course, the Watchtower caught onto this fact, saw that we’re nearly 100 years on since 1914 (or over 75 years if you believe the anointed had all been chosen by 1935, as they also taught) and saw they were in a little bit of a pickle. All of the anointed were dead or old and dying. At best, they had a few more years.
They obviously needed to redefine what “generation” meant. So they did! Now, the “generation” that will by no means pass away includes any other people who lived during the time of the anointed themselves. So if the last anointed person died today, a child born today would be part of the same generation.
It’s always funny when the Jehovah’s Witnesses try to redefine what words mean, but you have to admit that this one is a classic, and a stretch. I don’t consider my children to be from the same generation as me and I am sure none of you would either. The rank and file Jehovah’s Witness soaked up the new definition as the Governing Body rubbed their hands together in glee at having bought themselves another hundred or so years of “last days” to work from.
There are other reasons why the emblem partakers is rising, according to the Watchtower 2011 Aug 15 p.22:
Does this total represent the number of anointed ones on earth? Not necessarily. A number of factors — including past religious beliefs or even mental or emotional imbalance — might cause some to assume mistakenly that they have the heavenly calling. We thus have no way of knowing the exact number of anointed ones on earth; nor do we need to know.
Oh my! Some who take the emblems must have a mental imbalance, so say the Governing Body – a group of anointed who partake of the emblems every year… And if they don’t need to know how many people partake, why do they keep a record?!
Before I go, let me just leave you with this quote from the Watchtower Feb 15 2009, par.14 on p.27-28. Being as the statistics above come from their own published reports, it makes this lie a really special gem:
…the number of anointed ones on the earth has decreased over the decades…
So, if you are going to the memorial today, take a good look at the children and the senior citizens and remember that they are all part of your generation. Also, when the 2012 stats come out about how many people partook of the emblems (remember you read it here first), notice that the number of anointed will have increased yet again.